Radio Waves

I probably listen to the radio more often than most people do. When I was younger my Mom’s radio was a constant presence (WXYT – 1270 in Detroit) while she was doing stuff around the house. On top of that, my parents severely limited the amount of TV I was allowed to watch when I was a kid, but radio was a freebie. So as a kid growing up in the 80’s I actually listened to the old Superman and Buck Rogers radio shows. I remember the first time I heard the Lions version of "Another One Bites the Dust" on WLLZ – 98.7 and I recall spending quite a bit of time wondering who Judas Priest was and why he wanted me to break the law after I heard their rock anthem on the RIF, WRIF – 101.1. Sunday nights were always reserved for the Sunday Sports Albom. I started listening to sports radio in the summer of 1994 (I think) with the creation of WDFN – 1130 (the Fan) in Detroit. Since then, I’ve also lived in Milwaukee and Chicago and listened to their resident sports stations. I’ve heard some good shows over the years and some real bad ones. I started to listen to WMVP – ESPN 1000 in Chicago when I moved here. There is another station in town, WSCR – 670, but they are practically unlistenable so I discarded them right away. At the time ESPN 1000 had an afternoon host that was entertaining because he was off the charts on the unintentional comedy scale. His name is Bill Simonson, nickname Huge, and he practically rewrote the definition for jackass. The main component of the aptly named Huge show, was Huge going off about how cool he is and how everyone else is a wuss. Once he challenged any woman in the Chicago region to one – on – one and he promptly got his ass kicked by woman after woman. He wrapped up his time in Chicago by getting beaten up by a bunch of teenagers outside of Sox park. After being bested by both women and children it was increasingly hard to maintain his "tough guy" rep and Huge packed up shop and is currently debasing the airwaves in Grand Rapids.

After a few failed pairings after Huge was kicked to the curb, ESPN 1000 settled on the apparently successful three-headed monster of "Mac, Jurko, and Harry". At first, Afternoon Thunder, as they liked to be called in the early days, was a nice relief from Huge, but then I stared to hear Mac (Dan McNeil) and Jurko (ex NFL’er John Jurkovic) subbing on other shows and I realized how much Harry (Harry Teinowitz) was dragging down the whole production. At the time I was a loyal listener, if I was operating a radio between 3-7 it was tuned to Afternoon Thunder, but not anymore. I can’t stand Harry. In my listening opinion, he personifies a number of personality traits that I loathe. He’s gratingly whiny, he’s a unabashed bandwagon jumper (one of the few Chicagoans who seem to support both teams, Bruce Levine is another – don’t get me started on him), and he seems to have a big mouth that gets him into physical confrontations where he undoubtedly turtles like Claude Lemiuex (see picture). While I wouldn’t consider an obvious lack of athletic ability as a personality flaw, it does limit one’s ability to opine about sports, team sports in particular, and there is no way that anyone could convince me that Harry has a speck of athletic ability. So long story short, I don’t listen to Mac and Jurko anymore because I can’t stand Ferry, oops I meant Harry. My afternoon radio time is now filled with Steve Dahl and, egad, actual music.

Radio and I have been going through a tough spell as of late. Howard Stern’s departure caused a gaping hole in my morning radio. I’ve thought siriusly about following him to satellite, but I only have room for so many $10-15 monthly charges, and TiVo and Netflix are higher on my priority list right now. I also have a problem with Sirius running commercials during Howard’s show, even though I’m paying to receive it. Anyway, that’s another issue for another day. I know one thing for sure, nothing will ever match the halcyon days of Drew and Mike and a little donut shop terrorism.